Going in Circles
by Moony3003
Summary: Alec wants honest answers but Magnus is still reluctant to give them. Rated T. Slash - Alec/Magnus. Set in CoFA.


**Disclaimer: **TMI and its characters do no belong to me.

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><p>AN: First Mortal Instruments story. Set during book 4 - City of Fallen Angels. While reading it I imagined how Magnus would get out of talking to Alec about his past and all I could think was he'd seduce him.

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><p><span>Going in Circles<span>

The warlock's eyes blinked open, the eyelids flickering fleetingly. He had the vertical pupils of a cat, his eyes a startling gold-green. Through the open curtains, moonlight poured in through the window, casting everything in dim light and dark shadows, some of them developing long shapes against the walls.

Magnus Bane was lying on his back as he stared at an armchair sitting in the corner that was neon yellow but in the darkness it looked much darker. In the centre of it was a tiny cat with smooth white fur. Chairman Meow's head was tucked into his stomach as he slept. In the quietness of the room, Magnus could hear him purring. The sound was oddly comforting.

Shifting slightly, Magnus placed an arm behind his head before turning slowly to look at the body lying next to him. The young boy, _man_, was lying on his side, his back to him. He was fast asleep, his legs bent with both arms tucked in close to his body. Over all the years he'd been alive, he sometimes enjoyed watching people sleep. It was interesting how different everyone was.

A small but almost sad smile pulled at his lips as he continued to stare at him. Alec Lightwood certainly was beautiful. His jet-black hair ended at his jawline, his fringe entering his eyes telling Magnus that he needed a hair cut and he had stunning blue eyes that were currently out of view which always disappointed him when it was the case.

Slowly, his gaze move downwards. Alec's chest rose and fell evenly in time with his breathing. The runes that usually marked his body were all gone, leaving behind thin, white scars. The lower half of his body was covered by the opaque white bedsheet that was draped over them.

"Stop staring at me," murmured a sleepy voice.

Magnus's smile widened, showing a tint of his gleaming white teeth. "I cannot help myself," he said honestly.

When the young Shadowhunter didn't stir any further, Magnus rolled onto his side and shuffled in close, pressing Alec's warm body against his. There was a low groan from Alec who shifted but didn't change positions. Magnus wrapped an arm around his middle and pressed Alec to him as close as possible. At the intimate guesture, Magnus felt Alec's body turn tense.

"What's wrong?" Magnus asked directly.

"Nothing," said Alec, a little too quickly.

There were a silent pause between them. Magnus waited to see if Alec was going to say anything else but when he didn't, he nodded, mostly to himself. Magnus decided not to push the issue and cause another argument between them. The soft skin against his gave him a much needed distraction and he lowered his head, placing light kisses on Alec's shoulder and neck, making him squirm slightly.

When Magnus discovered that Alec was somewhat ticklish it had delighted him. Although the feeling hadn't been mutual. Alec hated that Magnus found it so entertaining. Abruptly, the kisses stopped when Alec shifted again but unable to move as he was trapped between Magnus and the edge of the bed.

Magnus laid his head against the pillow, catching the scent of soap and sandalwood. He fixed his eyes on the back of Alec's head and after a few minutes of continued silence, his fingers moved against Alec's chest. Instantly, Alec shuddered involuntarily in his arms and exhaled sharply as though he hadn't expected the action but he did nothing else so Magnus stopped and closed his eyes, listening to Alec's breathing.

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><p><em>The wind passed through as though he hadn't been standing there. The thick branches of the towering trees rattled wildly and leaves of green and brown and orange were scattered along the yellowing summer grass. There were no clouds in the sky that was clear and a beautiful light blue.<em>

_Blue._

_The word made a breath catch in his throat and turn his mouth bone dry. There was something about that colour, something he was supposed to remember. What was he forgetting? The colour blue was important, more important and urgent than he could remember anything ever being._

_He glanced around. Behind him were a row of houses that all looked identical. The sky above them wasn't perfect. It was overcast with heavy, grey clouds that blocked out all traces of the sunlight that fell down around him in the field. In the other direction there were more trees that loomed high in the sky. In the distance a bright blaze of orange filled his vision, making him glance away briefly._

_Once his eyes adjusted he watched it, wanting to ask what it was despite no one being around. The orange had been fire and it blazed through the trees but it didn't move towards him. It just kept spreading further out, blocking out the sky with black impenetrable smoke._

"_Goodbye."_

_The simple word that came from a voice that wasn't his shocked him enough that he looked away from the fire. The man was already walking away from him and not once did he turn, not even when he shouted. Had he shouted? The black hair stood out startling clear against the pale skin marked with black runes. A silver, gleaming bow was held in one hand while a quiver rested on his back, full of clear, long arrows. The shiny black gear glinted in the fading sunlight as he continued walking towards the forest and the fire._

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><p>Magnus awoke with start, bolting upright, a confused expression written across his face. The white opaque sheet was twisted around his legs and a thin layer of sweat covered his half-naked body, giving him a light shine. A glance to the other side of the bed sent a jolt of panic through him. It was empty. Questions raced through his mind as he listened hard for any noises outside the bedroom, the dream getting pushed back.<p>

How long had he been asleep? How had Alec gotten away without waking him? Was Alec gone? What had he done wrong now?

A sudden noise followed by a muttered curse word told him that Alec hadn't left, he was just in the living room. Magnus immediately got up and left the bedroom, the hem of his dark red pajama pants dragging along the floor. The living area was the biggest room by far in the apartment and most days he liked to decorate it differently.

Yesterday he'd settled on large puffy sofas in bright colours and a large white rug that covered most of the floor. The white walls had been jazzed up with old French movie posters and a large, black metal bookcase sat in the far corner, stacked to the brim with books and a few instruments that came useful in summoning spells.

"Alec?"

At his voice the young Shadowhunter froze, dropping the long black jacket, that had been made from a similar material to Shadowhunter gear, onto the bright pink sofa. His blue eyes were wide and he looked slightly guilty as though he'd been caught doing something wrong.

"Sorry," muttered Alec, not sounding it as he glanced away. "Did I wake you?"

"No," said Magnus in a stern tone of voice. "Where are you going?"

"Back to the Institute," said Alec, retrieving his jacket with shaking fingers.

"Why?" asked Magnus.

But Alec didn't answer and when Magnus took a step closer, he recoiled and put more distance between them. Magnus could tell that Alec was uncomfortable and looking as though he wanted to run out the door as soon as possible, eager to get away.

"Why?" Magnus asked again, breaking the growing silence that was full of tension.

"You know why," Alec said simply, sighing.

"No," said Magnus. "You don't get out of this so easily, not again. Tell me what's bothering you."

"We can't keep going in circles," muttered Alec, turning his back on him.

"Stop, Alexander," said Magnus, his voice growing cold. "I don't care how often we have to discuss something. I want to help you with whatever is bothering you."

It was silent again for a moment as Alec straightened, sighed and turned to face Magnus again. Their eyes met and Alec no longer look guilty. A strange serene expression came over his face before it slowly contorted into barely controlled anger. His next words were colder than Magnus's had just been and it became clear that he wanted to get away before he said too much.

"This _relationship,_" Alec started venomously, "is completely one-sided. You know everything about me. Whenever you ask me something I give you honest answers, every time but you don't give me the same consideration. Were you like this with all the others you dated? Oh, wait, I forgot, Camille knows everything about you. I'm sure the same goes for the werewolf and Will."

Magnus visibly flinched at the mention of Camille's name. Alec wasn't entirely sure why but he took meager pleasure in seeing it. His expression went back to anger as Magnus closed the distance between them within seconds and cupped his cheeks with both hands. He tilted Alec's face up so they looked at each other.

"Don't," muttered Alec.

Their lips brushed against each other before it turned into a full kiss. It started off gentle and Alec could still faintly taste the toothpaste Magnus used before going to bed. Magnus's lips were soft and he felt them part his and the tongue that instantly dove inside. One of Magnus's hands slipped away from his cheek, his fingers entwining with his soft dark hair.

Despite himself, Alec returned the kiss and it suddenly turned brutal and possessive. When Magnus's lips left his and he kissed down his neck. The other hand fell from his cheek, sliding down his torso before crawling beneath his dark grey T-shirt, feeling the hardened muscles, devloped from all the years of hard training. Magnus's long fingers grazed over a nipple, making Alec moan and bury his head into his shoulder.

The hand in Alec's hair tightened on the dark locks, pulling his head up and back into another kiss. Gently Alec's head was turned to the side so Magnus could deepen the kiss. The hand on his chest then slid down his chest, his stomach and finally to his abdomen where the fingers teased at the top of his dark jeans. It was then that Alec's mind cleared. He brought up his arms, placed his hands against the warlock's chest and pushed him away harshly. Both of them were breathing hard, their eyes wide and cheeks flushed.

"You can't keep doing this!" Alec half-shouted.

"What am I doing, Alec?" asked Magnus innocently, his cat-eyes gleaming brightly.

"You're using the physical part of our relationship to distract me," said Alec. "Every time I ask about your past lovers you attempt to seduce me."

"Attempt?" said Magnus with a slightly amused smile, questioning the use of the word. "I'm pretty sure I succeeded those other times."

"This isn't funny, Magnus," warned Alec.

Magnus walked to a vivid purple sofa that was sitting diagonally to the pink one and he sat down heavily, his smile gone. "What is it you want, Alec?" asked Magnus, suddenly sounding tired.

"An honest answer," said Alec.

Magnus sighed as he met his boyfriend's sharp gaze. "I never dated Will," Magnus said eventually. "What I had with Woolsey, I wouldn't even know what to call it precisely, was a purely physical exchange and temporary until I found a new place. And Camille... was complicated. I wasn't her lover, I was her pet."

Alec nodded slowly as he listened. "And all the others?" he asked when the warlock stopped speaking.

"Irrelevant," said Magnus with a lazy wave of his hand. "You wanted something honest and I gave it to you and I'll give you another." He paused and leaned forward, his elbows resting on his knees, waiting until he had Alec's full attention. "I haven't loved anyone like I love you."

A breath hitched in Alec's throat as those weren't words he expected to hear. Suddenly, he wasn't sure how to feel about what he'd just heard. It was a shock and Alec wondered if he should feel bad about anything he'd just said or be sorry about the anger behind it. Was he justified in it?

Alec walked over and sat down beside Magnus on the yellow sofa. He moved in close and laid his head on Magnus's shoulder. An arm instantly went around him, fingers stroking his hair. Alec closed his eyes and breathed deeply. The issues he knew he had weren't settled but it was a start.

"Is it enough?" Magnus asked.

"Yes," said Alec. "It's enough. For now."

Alec lifted his head and gently kissed Magnus on the mouth. It was Magnus's turn to moan and he quickly deepened the kiss again. This one didn't turn rough. It stayed soft and full of love. The pressure on the back of Alec's head increased and he shifted himself onto Magnus's lap, returning the kiss with everything he had.

The control shifted to Alec as he took control of the kiss, eventually pulling away to kiss Magnus's cheek, swiftly moving onto his neck and throat. Magnus's other hand settled on Alec's hip, wanting further contact. He almost brought up the dream but decided to keep it to himself. He knew what it meant but part of him didn't want to consider the possibility of Alec walking away from him and into danger.


End file.
